Trust
by yintotheyang
Summary: Part 9 of the Living In A Moment series.
1. Fears and Forgiveness

A/N – Alright, here is the next part of the series. I know it's been awhile, so to refresh your memory, Johnny and Lulu are engaged now and Johnny is still working to get control of the Zacchara organization so he can turn it over to Jason. Any other questions you have, feel free to ask. I hope everyone enjoys and please leave me a lovely review!

**Chapter 1 – Fears and Forgiveness**

Johnny just shook his head and headed for the liquor cart. Trevor had been in his office for a meeting for a little over two minutes and Johnny was already reaching for his best scotch. It wasn't enough that Trevor was annoyingly alive, but he also had to continuously remind Johnny that Anthony was still somewhat in charge. A fact that Johnny was ready to make a thing of the past. And he was almost there.

"You need a clear head, John," Trevor chided.

"Then stop giving me a headache," Johnny snapped.

"I'm only telling you what your father wanted passed along," Trevor replied. "Maybe you could visit him every now and then and hear his messages for yourself."

"Every time I see my father, he tries to tell me how to live my life," Johnny said angrily. "I'm an adult, I can do what I want. So, no, I'm not going to go see him."

"Your father is only concerned that your attachment to the Spencer girl will compromise the business," Trevor explained.

"My father thinks that Lulu is more important to me than the business and he's right," Johnny corrected. "I'm not going to apologize for that either."

"Are you going to apologize to Lulu when you get her killed?" Trevor wondered.

"Lulu is safe and she's going to stay that way," Johnny said adamantly.

"What makes you so sure?" Trevor asked. "Is it because you have so many guards on her that no one could ever get to her? Or that you think none of our enemies will hurt her because they're afraid of what you might do?"

Johnny just glared at Trevor and tried not to let the words effect him. Trevor knew that Lulu didn't have guards on her, not that Johnny hadn't wanted them to be there. They had discussed it once when they finally took their relationship public and again when they had gotten engaged. The first time Lulu just said no and refused to listen to anything Johnny had to say on the matter. The second time they had fought for three days, resulting in Johnny finally giving in because he couldn't stand having Lulu upset with him. He knew he should insist on at least one guard on her, but he let his desire to make Lulu happy compromise her safety.

Then there was the second question. Trevor was constantly reminding Johnny that no one respected him because he wasn't making bold moves with the business. Johnny knew that was probably true, but he refused to do something that could haunt him later. He also knew that if his enemies didn't respect him, they wouldn't think twice about hitting the people he loved just to get to him. Which meant, once again Trevor was right and that Lulu was in danger.

"I protect Lulu in ways you don't know about," Johnny lied. "So you can stay out of my life, too."

"John, she's a liability," Trevor replied.

"I said that's enough," Johnny yelled, slamming his glass down on the cart. "If you don't want to talk about the business, fine, I really don't care to either. But don't mention Lulu to me ever again unless you don't mind paying for it."

"What's the matter, John?" Trevor laughed. "Trouble in paradise?"

"I'm leaving," Johnny sighed, grabbing his keys off the desk.

"We have things to discuss, still," Trevor called, stopping Johnny at the door.

"I'll be back tomorrow," Johnny said, turning around. "Then maybe you can remember who's in charge here and stop patronizing me."

"You can't run from this forever, John," Trevor said, shaking his head. "You're a Zacchara. Pretty soon Lulu's going to be a Zacchara, too. You can't just stop being who you are just because you want to be normal. You aren't normal and you never will be."

"Don't think for a second you know anything about me, Trevor," Johnny replied harshly.

With that, Johnny turned and walked out of the office and stalked toward his car. He was tired of Trevor and his mind games. He needed to go see Lulu and just relax a little for once. He got in his car and pulled out his phone to call Lulu, but was stopped by the text message he received. Jason needed to meet with him.

Johnny just sighed heavily and shifted the car into gear. Seeing Lulu would have to wait a little longer.

* * *

Lulu walked into the Metro Court and looked skeptically toward the front desk. Carly was there and as much as Lulu wanted to talk to her cousin, she was also nervous. They hadn't spoken much since Lulu had begun dating Johnny and Lulu wanted to change that. Lulu approached the desk as Carly finished with her customer.

"Hey," Lulu said softly and Carly smiled.

"Lulu, I'm so glad to see you," Carly said, coming around and giving Lulu a hug.

"I hope I'm not interrupting," Lulu said as Carly led her to sit down on the couches in the lobby.

"Of course not," Carly replied. "I've been wanting to call you, but I didn't know if you were still angry with me or not."

"I got over being angry months ago," Lulu shrugged. "I just didn't know how to talk to you when I know you clearly don't approve of me being with Johnny."

"Oh, honey," Carly chuckled. "I'm not going to lie, knowing you're with him makes me very nervous. But only because of what he does. It puts you in danger and I don't like to think of you being in danger."

"I know you're worried, but I'm fine," Lulu smiled. "And I'm happy."

"Well, that is most important to me," Carly said, patting Lulu's hand and noticing her ring. "And you're engaged?"

"Yeah," Lulu admitted, smiling widely. "For about two months now. I figured you heard."

"No, that word somehow has not gotten around," Carly said, still in shock. "I can't believe you're getting married."

"We haven't set a date or anything," Lulu explained. "Actually, there are no details, but there's also no rush. He said he just needed to know I would marry him."

"It's a little crazy to see you get those big love eyes and talk that way," Carly laughed. "How long have you been talking like that?"

"Probably since Johnny told me he loved me," Lulu shrugged. "And I realized I was hopelessly in love with him."

"Love looks good on you," Carly complimented.

"Thanks," Lulu replied.

"Okay, we have a lot of catching up to do, but first I want to give you just one piece of advice about Johnny and then I'll drop the topic forever," Carly said, looking at Lulu for permission.

"Okay," Lulu said cautiously.

"I'm sure you've thought about dealing with a life time of danger and the possibility of raising kids in that lifestyle," Carly started. "And I'm sure you've talked about those things with Johnny and you two have plans of some kind. But I want you to remember that his life is also stressful and sometimes secretive. You're enough like me to hate secrets and being kept out of the loop, so I want you to be ready for that. And also to remember that sometimes you won't be able to help Johnny even when you want to."

"I know you mean well," Lulu said, smiling at Carly. "And I heard you, but it's not like that with me and Johnny. I don't mind not knowing about the business details and he tells me the big stuff because he doesn't want secrets between us. As far as the stress, we're still early enough in our relationship where I can help him with that some. And actually, that shows no signs of changing."

"You seem pretty confident," Carly observed.

"I know how to keep Johnny happy," Lulu said coyly.

"And how is that?" Carly asked with a laugh.

"A lady never tells," Lulu replied, laughing as well.

"Of course," Carly agreed. "So are you free for dinner?"

"Actually, Johnny told me earlier to keep my evening free, so I don't think so," Lulu answered. "But maybe we could do lunch next week?"

"Definitely," Carly nodded. "I know you said there's no rush, but I want to start early in convincing you to have your wedding here."

"Okay," Lulu laughed, giving Carly a hug. "Bye."

"Bye," Carly replied, watching her leave.

* * *

Johnny looked around Sonny's warehouse and marveled at how easy it was to get in one. Anyone could enter and Johnny wondered if the Zacchara warehouses had better security. He heard someone coming so he moved behind a crate just in case someone else was in the warehouse. When he saw Jason he stepped out and made his presence known.

"Hey," Johnny called and Jason turned around. "Why did you want to meet?"

"I'm worried about Sonny," Jason answered. "We may need to bring him into the mix."

"We agreed that was a bad move," Johnny argued.

"He's going to know soon anyway," Jason countered. "I think we should get it over with and tell him."

"Look, you know him best, but if he doesn't agree with the plan then he could blow it," Johnny replied. "We can't risk that."

"I don't think he would do anything that could put Lulu in danger and I plan to make it very clear that she would be the one at risk," Jason explained.

"Then you're sure as hell not going to tell him," Johnny said angrily. "If you only think he won't risk Lulu's life, that's not good enough for me."

"Why are you so worked up?" Jason asked.

"You come here and tell me you want to change up the plan and you don't think I'm going to have an opinion?" Johnny questioned.

"I didn't think you wouldn't have an opinion, but I didn't expect to get my head bitten off," Jason said calmly. "What is going on?"

"I just had another confrontation with Trevor and he's getting under my skin," Johnny answered.

"What did he say?" Jason wondered.

"What I already know is true," Johnny sighed. "That Lulu will never be safe with me and that by asking her to marry me, I basically just signed her up for a life of pain."

"Okay, this isn't you," Jason noted. "You're getting out of the business to keep Lulu safe. Unless you've changed your mind."

"No, I haven't," Johnny said, shaking his head. "But I'm starting to realize that no matter where I go or what I do, my last name will still be Zacchara."

"What do you mean?" Jason asked.

"I mean that even if I'm not involved in the business, some people might still come after me just because of who my father is," Johnny explained. "Maybe my father screwed someone over and he wants to come after me for revenge. They don't care that I'm not a part of the business, they just want someone to pay. So they hurt me by taking Lulu away from me."

"You will still have some protection because of me," Jason offered.

"Lulu doesn't even have guards on her now," Johnny admitted.

"What? Why?" Jason wondered.

"She doesn't want them and I'm too weak to force her," Johnny said, pressing his fingers to his forehead. "I'm asking for something to happen to her."

"No, you're not," Jason argued. "You're trying to respect her wishes. Maybe you shouldn't, but that's not being weak."

"Don't make excuses for me," Johnny said miserably. "I've made all of these promises to Lulu and they're all lies. I'll never be a man who can keep her safe. Or our hypothetical children. Maybe I should just stop lying and tell Lulu it's never going to work."

"What you need to do is actually think and stop letting every fear in your mind control you," Jason advised. "And if you legitimately think there is a problem, then you need to talk to Lulu. Not just tell her it's over and break her heart and yours, too."

"I know," Johnny nodded.

"So about Sonny," Jason said slowly.

"Use your judgment," Johnny shrugged. "I trust you."

"It's going to be okay," Jason assured him.

"I hope so," Johnny smiled sadly.


	2. Thinking

A/N – So a lot of people were sort of sad after the last chapter. I don't know that I'm going to offer you much solace here, but I can say that there is a method to my madness and what is happening now is important for building a better future for Jolu. Thank you for reading and leave me a lovely comment so I know what you think.

**Chapter 2 – Thinking**

Lulu looked at the clock and noticed it was already after seven. She had expected Johnny to call long ago and she was starting to get worried. She took out her phone and dialed his number, trying to assure herself that everything was okay. The phone rang four times and then went to voice mail. She shook off the nervous feeling, telling herself something work related had come up and it was no big deal.

"Hey, Johnny, it's me," Lulu said, leaving him a message. "I know you're probably busy with something, but I was just wondering if you were wanting to have dinner. It's getting late, but I don't want to eat without you if you're going to come to the cabin. I...um...guess I'll see you later or talk to you or something. I love you. Bye."

Lulu closed her phone and tried to shake the strange feeling. Johnny never made any kind of plans with her and then didn't show up or at least call if he had been held up. It just didn't sit right with her to not have heard from him.

* * *

Johnny listened to Lulu's message for the second time. She had sounded a little worried in the message and he hated to make her think something was wrong, but the truth was something was wrong. He needed to think before he could see her and talk to her about what was running through his mind.

The phone rang again and he looked down, seeing her name come across the screen. His heart was begging him to pick it up, telling him if he just heard her voice, everything would be okay. But he knew that relief would only be momentary. The worries would still be there and he needed to sort them out. He pressed a button and let the call go to voice mail. He sighed and ran a hand over his face. As soon as the phone beeped signaling he had a message, he pressed the button that would let him listen to it.

"_Hey, it's me again_," Lulu said, sounding upset. "_I know I just left a message, but I'm worried and I want you to know that I need to hear from you as soon as possible. I don't like not knowing what's going on and I don't like that you told me to keep my evening free and then practically disappeared on me. It's not like you. I love you so much, so please just call me and let me know everything is okay._"

He wanted to do what she needed. But he couldn't call her and tell her everything was okay because it wasn't. He didn't know when it would be or if it would be. He hated himself for not calling her and telling her something, but it wasn't the time. He put his car in gear and headed for the country roads to hopefully clear his mind on a long drive.

* * *

Lulu had called Johnny five times and gotten no answer and she finally had gone into full panic mode. She beat on Jason's door and waited for him to open it. She hammered on it again as he took more than two seconds to answer and she was starting to go crazy. Jason opened the door and Lulu strode into the apartment with purpose.

"Have you heard from Johnny?" Lulu asked.

"I saw him earlier," Jason nodded.

"How much earlier?" Lulu wondered.

"About an hour ago," Jason said, looking at the clock.

"Was he okay?" Lulu questioned.

"He had a lot on his mind," Jason said vaguely.

"What kind of things?" Lulu demanded.

"Lulu, it's not-" Jason started.

"Don't you dare say it's not my business, Jason," Lulu yelled, cutting him off. "Johnny is my fiancé and the love of my life. He is my business."

"I was going to say, it's not my place," Jason said calmly.

"What does that mean?" Lulu asked.

"It means, you have to wait and talk to Johnny," Jason replied.

"But he's not answering my calls," Lulu muttered, falling into the couch. "You don't think something happened to him, do you?"

"No, I actually know that you're his emergency contact, so if something had happened, you would know," Jason assured her.

"How do you know that?" Lulu wondered.

"He mentioned it when he was in the hospital last fall," Jason shrugged.

"So the real question is, why doesn't he want to talk to me?" Lulu asked.

"I don't think he's ignoring you out of anger or anything like that," Jason said, sitting next to her on the couch. "Maybe he turned his phone off. Or maybe he just needs time to calm down."

"So he was upset when he talked to you?" Lulu questioned.

"Lulu," Jason breathed, rolling his eyes slightly. "You're going to make yourself crazy trying to figure all of this out when I promise, everything is going to be fine."

"Going to be, but isn't now," Lulu noted. "Something happened, don't deny it. Just tell me what I need to do when he finally decides to talk to me."

"You need to listen," Jason answered. "And try not being so stubborn. If he asks something of you, put yourself in his shoes and consider that it might be really important to him."

"Okay," Lulu nodded. "Do you think he'll call me soon?"

"Yeah," Jason replied. "He loves you more than anything and sometimes that still scares him, I think."

"I just worry he'll over think things and suddenly try and push me away or something," Lulu sighed.

"He could try, but I doubt it would work," Jason smiled. "You wouldn't leave and if by some miracle you did, he couldn't actually let you walk away."

"Thanks for being a good friend, Jason," Lulu said, giving him a small hug. "To both of us."

"You don't need to thank me," Jason said, shaking his head. "I consider it a privilege to know you both."

Lulu said goodbye to Jason and left his apartment. She didn't know what Johnny was thinking or when she would hear from him, but she hoped it would be soon. He worried entirely too much and that worried Lulu. She willed him, wherever he was, to trust her and trust the love they had for each other. And to call her back so they could make everything right.

* * *

Driving had gotten Johnny nowhere. Lulu had stopped calling him and he was sure by now she was upset with him or running around town trying to find him. He didn't want either of those things, but he still didn't know what to do. He didn't know what to say to make Lulu understand his fears because he didn't understand them himself. All he knew was that he was worried that one day he would wake up and Lulu would be gone. She would be taken from him and forced to pay the price of being married to Johnny Zacchara. He was starting to see that being out of the business didn't necessarily mean being free. And he was starting to question if he could willingly put Lulu through all of that.

He found himself walking through the park. He remembered being a kid and wishing he could play freely in the park without having guards surround him. He wondered about the children that he and Lulu wanted to have, if they would be like him. Would they be confined and long for freedom? He knew how much Lulu detested the thought of having guards on her and he had the same attitude toward the subject. Any child they could possibly have would most likely be the same way. He desperately wanted to have kids with Lulu, but he didn't think he could put his child through all of the trouble either.

No matter how much he thought about it, he couldn't decipher a way to make things better instantly the way he wanted to. He sat down on a bench and put his head in his hands. He had to make a decision. The only question was: how could he decide between saving Lulu from his life and letting her save him?


	3. An Unexpected Helper

A/N – I really didn't do this intentionally, but in proof reading this chapter it occurred to me that I went from sweet and innocent to evil and guilty. This probably makes no sense to any of you, but maybe it will after you read. LOL! Thank you for reading and please leave a comment!

**Chapter 3 – An Unexpected Helper**

Johnny was lost in his own thoughts as he sat on the park bench. He didn't know how long he had been sitting there trying to sort through things, but the sun had gotten a little lower in the sky. The July heat could still be felt and Johnny was starting to get uncomfortable. He felt a small tap on his shoulder and he raised his head from his hands to see Cameron looking at him with a confused expression.

"Hey, buddy," Johnny said, faking a smile. "What are you doing here?"

"Playing on the slide," Cameron answered, pointing in the direction of the playground equipment. "Mommy said I could come say hi, but not to bother you too much."

"You never bother me, little man," Johnny replied.

"But you don't want to play, do you?" Cameron asked, looking at Johnny.

"I'm kind of tired," Johnny said, ruffling Cameron's hair. "But thanks for the offer."

"Uncle Johnny," Cameron said softly.

"What, Cam?" Johnny asked.

"Are you sad?" Cameron wondered innocently.

"Not really," Johnny responded.

"Then how come you're just sitting here by yourself?" Cameron asked.

"I'm just thinking," Johnny shrugged.

"About what?" Cameron questioned, crawling onto Johnny's lap.

"Aunt Lulu," Johnny answered.

"No way," Cameron said, shaking his head. "You always smile when you think about Aunt Lulu."

"Well, right now I'm kind of worried about her," Johnny admitted.

"Is she okay?" Cameron asked.

"She's fine," Johnny assured him.

"Then why are you worried?" Cameron wondered.

"I'm worried she won't stay fine," Johnny replied.

"Because?" Cameron questioned, looking at Johnny intently.

"You sure are curious," Johnny laughed, tickling Cameron slightly.

"Uncle Johnny," Cameron squealed, wriggling around. "I'm...tryin' to...help."

"You are, huh?" Johnny asked, letting up on the tickling as Cameron nodded. "Well, I think that's nice."

"I just want you and Aunt Lulu to be together forever," Cameron smiled.

"And why is that?" Johnny wondered.

"'Cuz you love Aunt Lulu," Cameron said sweetly. "And she loves you. So you should live happily ever after."

"Like a fairytale?" Johnny asked.

"Fairytales are for girls, Uncle Johnny," Cameron sighed.

"Of course they are," Johnny nodded. "So why do you think me and Aunt Lulu should live happily ever after?"

"'Cuz Mommy says that love makes people happy," Cameron explained. "And you told me as a best friend secret that you're gonna love Aunt Lulu forever, no matter what."

"That's right, buddy," Johnny replied, remembering their conversation. "And you can never lie in a best friend secret."

"Right," Cameron said seriously.

"You really think me and Aunt Lulu can have a happily ever after?" Johnny asked and Cameron nodded.

"Know why?" Cameron wondered.

"Why?" Johnny questioned.

"It's a best friend secret," Cameron said, bringing his head closer to Johnny.

"Okay," Johnny said, smiling at the young boy's seriousness.

"I think Aunt Lulu's gonna love you forever, no matter what, too," Cameron whispered.

"You really think so?" Johnny asked, wondering how someone so young could see things so much clearer than he could.

"It's a best friend secret, you can't lie," Cameron sighed.

"Cam, I think you're the best, best friend, I've ever had," Johnny said, kissing his forehead.

"Really?" Cameron asked with wide eyes.

"Really," Johnny nodded, hugging Cameron tight. "I love you, Cam."

"I love you, too, Uncle Johnny," Cameron replied.

* * *

Lulu had all but given up on Johnny ever calling her again. She twirled her engagement ring anxiously around her finger as she paced the cabin slowly. She didn't like what was happening. She didn't know what exactly was happening, but she hated it, just the same. She glanced at the clock and sighed, realizing how late it had gotten. Whatever was on Johnny's mind must have been really upsetting for him. Which meant it would be upsetting for her as well.

She wandered over to the mantle where they had added pictures of them together. There was one from their camping trip and one of them with Cameron at Jake's birthday party. Lulu's favorite one was the one of she and Johnny at the overlook. They had been up there enjoying the view and she had gotten the camera out to take a picture of the two of them with the city behind them. When she had clicked the button, Johnny had sweetly kissed her on the cheek as she smiled widely.

Lulu took the frame of that picture in her hand and held it close to her chest. She inhaled a deep breath, trying to convince herself that everything was going to be okay. As if on cue, her phone rang and she let out the breath, placed the picture back on the mantle and answered.

"Johnny?" Lulu said hopefully.

"_Hey, beautiful_," Johnny replied.

"Don't you 'hey, beautiful' me!" Lulu said angrily. "You had me worried to death, not calling me back."

"_I'm sorry, Lulu_," Johnny sighed. "_I didn't want to worry you. I just had some things to do._"

"All of which were so important you couldn't call me and tell me first?" Lulu asked.

"_I don't want you to be mad_," Johnny muttered.

"Really? Because your actions kind of say otherwise," Lulu snapped.

"_I'm sorry!_" Johnny yelled. "_I can't say anything else or go back and change it. If you want to stay pissed off, fine. But I'd rather come to the cabin and talk about stuff._"

"Johnny, you never yell at me," Lulu said softly. "Even when I make you crazy, you always stay calm. What's going on?"

"_I didn't mean to yell, Lulu_," Johnny said, regret in his voice. "_Can I just come see you so we can talk?_"

"We're talking now," Lulu pointed out.

"_I'd rather talk about this face to face_," Johnny replied.

"I don't know if I want you to come over," Lulu admitted.

"_You're that upset?_" Johnny wondered.

"I'm not upset about you not calling," Lulu explained. "I'm upset that something is wrong and it's obviously serious. I don't want something to be wrong."

"_Can I come over or not?_" Johnny asked, ignoring Lulu's statement.

"It's your cabin, I can't stop you," Lulu said harshly.

"_It's your home_," Johnny countered. "_If you don't want to see me, I won't come. I just think we need to talk and putting it off won't make it go away._"

"You can come over on the condition that you're not going to try and break things off with me," Lulu replied, tears coming to her eyes. "I know you, Johnny. I know this tone. So promise we'll just talk and you won't make any decisions?"

"_I promise_," Johnny whispered. "_I'll be there as soon as I can._"

"I love you," Lulu said, wiping her eyes.

"_I love you more than anything_," Johnny responded.

She hung up the phone and ran a finger along the edge of the picture frame she had been holding. She remembered feeling so loved in the moment that photograph was taken. Every moment with Johnny made her feel complete. She didn't want to lose those feelings. She couldn't lose him.

* * *

Anthony had been surprised to hear he had a visitor. Trevor had already been by earlier in the day and Anthony did not expect him back so soon. When he entered the visitation room, he hoped to see Johnny sitting there. But instead of his son, he saw the man who he considered to be the biggest threat to the Zacchara organization: Sonny Corinthos.

"To what do I owe this pleasure?" Anthony asked sarcastically.

"I wanted to let you know that your son is practically running your business into the ground," Sonny laughed.

"Hardly," Anthony replied. "I know all of his dealings and my son is doing a fine job."

"Well, then let's be serious about why I'm here," Sonny said, looking Anthony square in the eye. "I'm going to offer this once and only once, so you should listen carefully. I'll give you five million dollars for your business."

"You want to buy me out?" Anthony scoffed.

"I'm not finished," Sonny continued. "That price buys your business and it also saves the life of your son. John is of no value to me, but I assume you don't want him dead. Although, you did shoot him yourself, so maybe I'm wrong about that."

"You wouldn't dare harm a hair on my son's head," Anthony fumed.

"Wouldn't I?" Sonny asked. "It's not as if I would have to worry about revenge. I'll just kill Johnny, take over your business and move on. You have no power anymore."

"Never underestimate me, Corinthos," Anthony spat. "For all you know, coming in here and making a threat like the one you just made could result in your death by the end of the night."

"I didn't make a threat," Sonny said coolly. "I made an offer, backed up by a promise."

"Well, your offer is being refused," Anthony replied. "And any sort of promises you just made will be broken. You will not touch my son or my business."

"We'll see," Sonny smiled. "Goodbye, Anthony."

Anthony watched Sonny leave the visitation room. The words that were spoken weighed heavily on Anthony's mind. If Sonny was targeting Johnny, there would be hell to pay.


	4. Confessions

A/N – I love all of you for reading and commenting. I'll be up front and say this is a tough chapter for Jolu, but they can get through it! Leave me a comment so I know how you feel about what is going on!

**Chapter 4 – Confessions**

Lulu heard the door open, but she didn't move from her spot on the couch. She heard his slight sigh, but she couldn't look at him. She couldn't offer him what he was looking for. He wanted her to greet him at the door as she often did with a hug and a kiss. Or just for her to look at him.

"I shouldn't have come," Johnny said softly. "You don't want to see me."

"It's not that," Lulu muttered, staring at the floor.

"Then what is it?" Johnny asked.

"I don't want to see you hurting," Lulu replied. "And I know you're about to hurt yourself. And hurt me, too."

"I promised not to end things," Johnny reminded her, taking a seat on the couch beside her, but not touching.

"Today," Lulu sighed. "But it doesn't mean you won't try tomorrow. Or try to push me away."

"I'm sorry," Johnny offered. "I'm sorry that you're so upset because seeing you this way kills me."

Lulu finally looked up at him and the tears in her eyes broke his heart. He moved closer to her and she collapsed into his chest, sobbing. She held tightly to his back and he wrapped his arms around her, resting his cheek against her hair as he tried to comfort her.

"Do you trust me, Lulu?" Johnny asked, holding her tightly.

"Of course," Lulu replied. "I trust you more than I've ever trusted someone."

"Good. Because I'm not going to end things," Johnny promised, pressing a kiss to her hair. "Ever. I could never leave you. I don't have the strength."

"Then what is going on, Johnny?" Lulu sniffed. "You're worried about something. What is it?"

"I'm worried about you," Johnny answered.

"Why?" Lulu wondered. "Did someone make a threat against me?"

"Not outright," Johnny responded, pulling away from her. "But it's only a matter of time."

"Johnny, you're almost out of the business," Lulu said in confusion. "Unless you're telling me you want to stay in the mob."

"I'm not staying in," Johnny said firmly. "But whether I'm the head of the Zacchara organization or not, I'm still me."

"What does that mean?" Lulu questioned.

"It means I will still be Anthony Zacchara's only son no matter what I do in the next few months," Johnny explained.

"So?" Lulu asked.

"So, I'll still be a target," Johnny replied. "And you will be, too. If you stay with me."

"What do you mean 'if'?" Lulu wondered.

"I have to be honest with you," Johnny sighed. "All the plans we made were contingent on the mob world not touching us. Getting married and having a family. We talked about all of that under the assumption that one day I would be completely free. But I'm starting to see that I can never be completely free. I can't run from my last name. The name that I want to give to you and our children. No matter what, if you choose to marry me, you become marked for life. And I can't let you marry me without you really understanding that."

Jason was frustrated at best. He had come to see Sonny and Milo had informed him that Sonny had gone to see Anthony. No matter how many different ways he pictured the conversation between Anthony and Sonny, he couldn't picture anything good. Sonny had probably tried to coerce Anthony into having Johnny start a war.

Jason took a seat on Sonny's couch to wait for him to return. He wondered if Johnny had talked to Lulu yet. He knew he should probably call Johnny and inform him that Sonny had been to see Anthony, but Jason didn't want to interrupt any possible important conversation that Johnny might have been having with Lulu. He was really hoping Johnny's stubborn side wasn't getting in the way.

Sonny walked through the doors and stopped, surprised to see Jason sitting in his living room. He closed the doors behind him and walked over to his liquor cart. He poured himself a glass of scotch and took a seat, finally turning his attention to Jason.

"I assume you're here on business," Sonny noted.

"Some business," Jason replied. "But mostly personal."

"Did someone threaten Carly or the boys?" Sonny asked.

"No," Jason said, shaking his head. "This is about Lulu. And Johnny."

"Good, we need to talk about Zacchara," Sonny nodded. "He's dead by the end of the week."

"No, he's not," Jason argued.

"Excuse me?" Sonny questioned. "That was an order. Not a time for you to voice your opinion."

"I'm telling you, I'm not going to kill Johnny Zacchara," Jason said firmly. "Not this week or next. Never."

"Fine, I have other people I can use," Sonny shrugged.

"You're not going to do that, Sonny," Jason fought.

"You're not going to tell me what I'm not gonna do, Jason," Sonny yelled.

"How are you going to explain to Luke that you killed his daughter's fiancé because you were threatened?" Jason wondered.

"It's business," Sonny snapped. "Luke would understand."

"I don't think so," Jason argued.

"This isn't the first time you've come to me trying to save Johnny Zacchara," Sonny said thoughtfully. "It can't just be because of who he is to Lulu. It's more than that."

"I know Johnny," Jason admitted. "He's a good guy. Nothing like his father."

"If you think that, then he has you fooled," Sonny said, shaking his head.

"If you think I'm a fool, then you don't know me very well," Jason countered.

"I'm having Johnny killed and that's that," Sonny said firmly.

Jason sighed to himself and knew he had to tell Sonny the plan. It was the only way to save Johnny's life.

"Sonny, you have no reason to kill Johnny," Jason said softly.

"He's the enemy," Sonny insisted, but Jason shook his head.

"No, he's not," Jason replied. "Johnny is going to get out of the business very soon. As soon as Anthony gives him complete control of the Zacchara organization."

"How do you know that?" Sonny asked.

"Because I helped him develop the plan," Jason answered.

"What plan? What's he going to do with the business when he gets control of it?" Sonny wondered.

"He's going to sell it to me," Jason responded.

Lulu sat silently, watching Johnny. He was so troubled by everything going on in his mind. And she didn't know how to make him stop worrying. Because his worries were legitimate.

Of course, she knew who he was and what came along with that, but she had naively thought that once he cut ties from the mob, the mob would cut ties from him. That they would just move on and not look back. As Johnny had explained to her that it wouldn't really be that way, she had gotten worried herself. She wanted to be Johnny's wife and to have his children one day, but how could she bring children into that life? Even if they were safe most of the time, there would always be a chance that something could happen.

"I wish you would say something," Johnny mumbled, staring at the floor.

"You kind of took me off guard," Lulu admitted.

"I wish I could be someone else for you," Johnny said sadly. "I wish we didn't have to have this conversation."

"I wouldn't want you any other way," Lulu smiled, placing her hand on top of his.

"How can you say that?" Johnny asked. "My family has put you through so much. And now I'm basically telling you that the last name I was given will haunt us forever."

"Because I love you for who you are," Lulu answered. "And you're who you are because of your family and the way you grew up."

"So, does that mean that you still want to get married?" Johnny questioned hopefully.

Lulu didn't respond right away, retracting her hand from his and Johnny's heart fell. He couldn't take it if she left him. He thought he could, convincing himself he could do anything if it meant Lulu's safety and happiness. But in the moment her hand released his, he wanted to die. He stood up and turned from her, not wanting her to see the tears that were forming in his eyes.

"Johnny," Lulu said, holding back tears of her own.

"Don't," Johnny pleaded. "I understand."

"I'm not saying no," Lulu offered. "I just need to think."

Johnny turned and opened his mouth to reply, but he was cut off by the ringing of his phone. He sighed and pulled his phone out to press ignore, but when he saw Jason's name flash across the screen he knew he needed to answer.

"It's Jason," Johnny muttered, looking at Lulu.

"Go ahead," Lulu nodded, standing and going over to the fireplace.

"Yeah?" Johnny answered.

"_Get over to my house, now!_" Sonny yelled.

"Excuse me?" Johnny asked. "I don't take orders from you, Corinthos."

"_If _y_ou think you can make a deal with my enforcer and not get my approval you have another thing coming_," Sonny said angrily. "_Get here within the half hour or you die. It's as simple as that._"

The call ended and Johnny just looked at his phone with questioning eyes. He glanced up at Lulu and she was looking at him expectantly.

"I'm sorry, but I have to go," Johnny sighed. "Sonny just threatened to kill me if I'm not standing in front of him in the next thirty minutes."

"What? Why?" Lulu wondered.

"I have no idea. It seems like Jason clued him in on the plan and he's not exactly excited about it," Johnny replied. "Do you want me to come back when I'm done or do you need to be by yourself for awhile?"

"I...I don't know," Lulu shrugged.

"Alright," Johnny nodded, trying to mask his hurt. "I'll...um...I'll call when I'm done. If that's okay?"

"Yeah," Lulu nodded. "Please do."

"Okay," Johnny agreed. "Bye."

"Bye," Lulu muttered, watching Johnny walk out of the cabin.

It was the first time in months he had left her without kissing her. Without saying he loved her. She knew he was protecting himself. He was afraid she was going to give back her ring and call off the wedding. And she was afraid of the very same thing.


	5. Sides and Choices

A/N – I really love Jason in this story. He's a really great friend to Jolu and it's funny because when I started out writing this series, I didn't exactly intend this, but I'm glad it has turned out this way. Thank you all for reading and I would love a review.

**Chapter 5 – Sides and Choices**

Lulu walked into the bathroom and turned on the water for a bath. Johnny's "house warming gift" to her when she moved into the cabin was having a Jacuzzi bathtub installed in the bathroom. Lulu knew it was the best money could buy, yet it still matched their simple décor of the bathroom. She ran herself a bath and turned on the jets in the tub. She added her favorite bubble bath and lit some candles in the bathroom. She disrobed and stepped into the warm water, trying to relax herself.

She knew she needed to think above all else. She needed to think rationally about what she could and could not do. Could and could not give. Could and could not take. But instead of thinking, her mind drifted. She closed her eyes and she let her mind wander back in time.

The first night she moved in, Johnny had come over and the night had been normal. Lulu was almost disappointed because she had been expecting a surprise from him. At almost nine, Johnny had left Lulu on the couch, announcing he was going to take a shower before bed. Lulu had pouted for fifteen minutes on the couch before going into the bedroom. When she didn't hear the water running, she decided to head into the bathroom so she could take her own shower before going to sleep. But when she stepped into the bathroom, her eyes lit up.

The bathroom was covered in rose petals and candles everywhere. Johnny was waiting for her in the new tub, which actually had a big red bow on the side. He smiled at her from the water and she immediately joined him. She realized Johnny had been sure to take care of unpacking all of her bathroom items earlier in the day. The bathtub was his surprise for her. They soaked in the tub, talking for awhile before making love.

Lulu loved the bathtub and used it often, with and without Johnny. But this time she was alone and she had to decide if she could still marry Johnny, taking into account everything he had told her earlier. In her heart, nothing had changed. She loved Johnny completely and she knew she always would. In her mind, a lot had changed. She had really become excited about being a mother one day. But having children that could be targeted one day was irresponsible. How could she do that?

Lulu sighed and sunk deeper into the tub. She hated the situation. All she wanted was for things to be simple for she and Johnny. Just once, she wanted to have everything be easy and for no one to be at risk just because they were together. But all of her wishing and wanting didn't make anything happen. She had to deal with the situation the way that it was.

If she only knew how.

Johnny stormed into Sonny's house and past his bodyguards. He pushed open the doors and glared at Sonny, who was sitting in his chair with a gun in his hand. Sonny looked to his watch and rolled his eyes.

"You made it with ten seconds to spare," Sonny muttered. "How unfortunate."

"Sonny, there's no reason to kill him," Jason spoke up from the desk.

Johnny turned to look at him, not having seen him before. From the position Jason was standing, it seemed as though he was ready to take the bullet should Sonny try to shoot Johnny. Johnny sighed to himself, thankful he had a friend like Jason.

"You keep saying that," Sonny acknowledged. "Now Johnny-boy gets to defend himself."

"I don't see why I need to defend myself," Johnny bit back.

"Do you have a death wish?" Sonny wondered.

Johnny's eyes flashed with pain. He wasn't sure. If he didn't have Lulu, he did have a death wish. He didn't want to live without her in his life.

"Do you want to know what I wish, Sonny?" Johnny asked, stepping closer to him. "I wish you would leave me the hell alone. I haven't tried to touch your business. Because this is not the life that I want. I want out and I will get out. That's why the plan I have with Jason exists. It's not to undermine you or to further your paranoia. It's for me and for Lulu."

"You talk the talk, but how do I know you're going to walk the walk?" Sonny questioned. "How do I know you won't go back on your deal with Jason once you get all that power? Maybe the taste of it will be addicting to you and you won't give it up."

"If you knew me, you would know I won't do that," Johnny replied. "But you don't know me because you've written me off as a poisonous Zacchara without trying to look deeper. Jason knows me, though. That's why the deal is between us and not involving you."

"It involves me," Sonny yelled. "Jason works for me."

"For now," Jason added.

"What?" Sonny asked in surprise.

"I work for you for now, but if you don't start showing Johnny respect, I will be leaving the organization when Johnny hands his business to me," Jason said calmly.

Johnny was really surprised and he didn't know what to think. Jason hadn't shared his intentions about leaving Sonny's organization and he didn't know if it was a bluff or not.

"You would leave the man who took you in and taught you everything you know for him?" Sonny questioned, nodding his head towards Johnny.

"Johnny is a good man," Jason replied. "I trust him with my life. I trust that he will always do what is best for Lulu and their life together. And if you really intend to go against Johnny, then yes, I will go against you."

"I see," Sonny sighed, looking at the floor.

"For what it's worth, I am a man of my word," Johnny said softly after a few minutes. "I made this deal with Jason and I am not going to go back on it. Lulu is my life and we want to make our life outside of the business. And we will. You can hate me, not trust me or do anything else you want to and I won't care. I'm not going to move against you at all, not even if you try to kill me."

"Why should I trust a Zacchara?" Sonny asked, making eye contact with Johnny.

"Because people are more than their last name," Johnny responded, hoping it was true.

"I'm going to let this little plan go on," Sonny said, taking his seat again. "But if I get the feeling you're going to betray Jason, I'll kill you and make it look like an accident."

"Okay," Johnny sighed.

"You're not going to fight back?" Sonny wondered.

"I can only say so much in defense of myself," Johnny shrugged. "You can either believe me or not, but it doesn't change the fact that I'm telling the truth."

Sonny shook his head and Johnny left the house. He heard Jason following after him, so he slowed his pace a little bit. Johnny stopped outside the front door and Jason came to a stop beside him.

"Did you mean what you said to Sonny?" Johnny asked.

"Yes," Jason nodded.

"I appreciate that," Johnny smiled.

"How is everything?" Jason wondered.

"She's thinking right now," Johnny answered, rubbing his forehead. "I basically explained to her that even when I leave the business we'll still be in danger and she said she needed to think about whether or not we should still get married."

"You two will get married," Jason said confidently.

"I hope so," Johnny muttered. "I...uh...was thinking if the wedding does happen that...uh...maybe you should be my best man."

"Me?" Jason asked.

"Yeah," Johnny breathed. "You're my best friend. Aside from Lucky, you're the only guy I really trust."

"Well, I would be honored," Jason replied. "Just let me know when you set the date and I'll be there."

"I wish I could be sure that everything will work out," Johnny sighed.

"You can't see things clearly because you're letting fear cloud your mind," Jason noted. "I can see things clearly and I know that one day, I'll be standing next to you as you marry the woman you love."

"Thanks, Jason," Johnny said, a smile coming to his face.

"Don't mention it," Jason responded, patting him once on the back.

Johnny headed for his car and tried to convince himself of what Jason had said. He hoped with everything inside of him that one day Lulu would walk down the aisle towards him in a white dress. And that they would spend forever together.

Trevor walked quickly into the room where Anthony was waiting for him. He took a seat across from Anthony and took in the dangerous man's expression. Anthony looked angry and Trevor was hoping he wasn't on the receiving end of the anger.

"Do you think Sonny Corinthos has the guts to go after my son?" Anthony asked.

"Sonny is a loose cannon," Trevor replied. "He will do anything. He's reckless and doesn't think things through."

"He wants to kill my Johnny," Anthony muttered.

"Why?" Trevor asked.

"He knows how much of a threat Johnny is," Anthony answered. "He's worried that he will lose his precious business."

"Tony, you know I'm never going to let anyone hurt Johnny," Trevor said, trying to calm Anthony down.

"That's right," Anthony smiled in a threatening way. "Because if Johnny dies, so do you."

"I'm aware," Trevor croaked.

"Now, go away," Anthony yelled. "Tell Johnny I want to see him soon."

"Alright," Trevor agreed, exiting the room quickly.

Trevor left and headed for his car. He would wait a few days and then send Johnny to calm Anthony down. Come up with a false story that Johnny could give Anthony about how he put Sonny in his place. He couldn't let Anthony start to get paranoid and angry or it would be bad for everyone.


	6. Just Like I Am

A/N – And so we come to another journey's end. I must say, I'm a slacker and I haven't started the next night in the series yet, though I do have it outlined. But, I can't say when it will be posted, just that it will come. You're not going to want to miss it because some major things will be going on. ;) I have another new story on the horizon that will probably get posted in about a week, maybe a week and a half and _Go the Distance_ is still going. Anyway, enough about me. Let's get back to Jolu, the important part! Enjoy and review if you would like! I know I would enjoy reading your feedback!

**Chapter 6 – Just Like I Am**

Johnny looked at the objects in his hand and smiled slightly. Lulu would think he was crazy for already having bought their wedding bands. They hadn't even set a date. He was still wondering if they would set a date.

When he had called Lulu from outside of Sonny's house, she had told him to come back to the cabin. Her voice had sounded sad, maybe even scared. He thought about telling her to take more time. Telling her to be sure of what she was going to say. Because he couldn't help but feel from the tone of her voice during the call that what she had decided would not be good for them.

He looked back at their wedding bands and then up at the cabin in front of him. There was no use putting off hearing whatever her decision was. He placed the wedding bands back in their hiding place in his glove compartment and stepped out of his car. He took a deep breath as he headed for the door and let himself in. Lulu was curled up on the couch, holding a mug in her hands and wearing one of his old t-shirts and her favorite pair of Smurfs pajama shorts. He smiled immediately at the sight of her and it amazed him that, even when things were strained between them and possibly drawing to an end, just seeing her in their place brought a smile to his face.

"I'm back," Johnny muttered, pulling her attention away from the mug in her hands.

"Oh hey," Lulu said, placing her mug on the coffee table. "I didn't hear you come in."

"Well, you seemed like you were pretty focused on something," Johnny noted.

"I was just thinking about that night I made you drink chamomile tea," Lulu laughed, pointing at her mug. "I had never seen a grown man pout so much in my life. You were worse than Cam when he has to eat his green beans."

"I didn't want to drink it," Johnny remembered.

"Yes, you asked me what your fellow mob bosses would think if they knew you were drinking something like chamomile tea," Lulu replied, laughing harder.

"But you wouldn't be seduced unless I drank the tea," Johnny sighed, shaking his head and laughing with her.

"I'm stubborn," Lulu shrugged, still giggling.

"Don't I know it," Johnny agreed. "I had to drink the tea."

"And you liked it," Lulu smirked, meeting Johnny's eyes for the first time.

"I said it was okay," Johnny corrected, walking over to sit by her on the couch.

"You drank the entire cup and probably would have asked for more had I not distracted you," Lulu argued.

"Distracted me?" Johnny asked, laughing again. "It was more like seeing me drink chamomile tea made you hot."

"Oh please, it wasn't the tea," Lulu blushed. "It was just you."

Johnny smiled and leaned in to kiss Lulu, but then stopped himself. Their walk down memory lane had almost made him forget about his apprehension from earlier.

"Why are we talking about chamomile tea, Lu?" Johnny wondered.

"I don't know," Lulu shrugged. "Probably because I was trying to put off the conversation you came here for us to have."

Johnny nodded his understanding and stood up. Lulu sighed and tugged on his hand, begging him to sit down again. He looked to her and did as she wanted, keeping hold of her hand in his like a life line.

"I want you to keep the ring," Johnny mumbled. "I bought it for you. I don't want it back."

"Of course I'm going to keep my ring," Lulu said, squeezing his hand. "I love my ring."

"Good," Johnny sighed, trying to remain in control of his emotions.

"Johnny, I'm scared," Lulu admitted. "I'm scared that no matter what I do today, I'm going to regret it one day."

"So, you haven't made a decision?" Johnny asked.

"I can't make a decision about us without you," Lulu answered. "I love you so much. I want us to decide together what's best for the both of us."

"You're what's best for me," Johnny replied. "But I don't know that I'm what's best for you."

"I know I feel safe with you," Lulu responded.

"Then why are you scared?" Johnny wondered. "Why do you think that one day you might regret choosing to stay with me?"

"Because of what you said about always being a Zacchara," Lulu explained. "Because I'm afraid that if one day some mob guy came after one of our kids and hurt them, I would blame you. That I would hate you for it and I never want that to happen."

"I don't want that either," Johnny muttered. "That's why I'm afraid of you staying with me. I'm so scared that one day something will happen that makes you stop loving me. And I don't think I could take it if it did."

"But how could it happen? How could I ever stop loving you?" Lulu asked. "I don't think it's possible."

"How could you keep loving me if my family name caused your family pain?" Johnny countered. "Or worse got them killed?"

"Because you aren't responsible for the people out there who hate the Zaccharas," Lulu answered. "Your father is."

"You just said you were scared you would blame me, but now you're saying you wouldn't," Johnny noted. "Which is it?"

"I don't know," Lulu sighed. "I can't accurately say what I would do without being in the situation. But what I do know is that even if I blamed you or felt like I hated you, I would really love you. Loving you is a part of who I am. I'm Lulu, I have blonde hair, I like chamomile tea and I am in love with Johnny Zacchara."

"I'm in love with you," Johnny smiled. "I will always love you and only you."

"I know," Lulu nodded.

"But?" Johnny asked.

"No buts," Lulu replied.

"Then what is it?" Johnny questioned. "Because I have a feeling you're thinking love isn't enough."

"Is it?" Lulu wondered. "Can we love each other enough to survive whatever may happen to us in the future?"

"No, love isn't enough," Johnny supplied. "We have to trust, too."

"I trust you," Lulu said with confidence. "I always have."

"I don't just mean trusting me now," Johnny explained. "I mean trusting yourself now. And trusting us for the future."

"I don't understand," Lulu replied.

"Trust that you can make the right decision right now," Johnny expanded. "Trust that no matter what, in the future we'll always face everything together."

"Do you trust yourself?" Lulu wondered.

"No," Johnny shook his head. "I haven't had any trust in myself at all today. I've been second guessing every decision I've made and it's gotten me nowhere. So I'm going to make a commitment to trust myself. And to trust that no matter what, we can make it through. Because we have each other."

"What about me?" Lulu questioned.

"What you do is up to you," Johnny shrugged. "You can decide to trust yourself, trust your feelings. Or you can decide it's not worth it."

"You, Johnny, are worth it," Lulu said, tears coming to her eyes.

"Yeah?" Johnny asked.

"Yes," Lulu nodded. "You're worth living with a little fear and danger because in comparison, I am much more afraid of a life without you than I am of a life with you."

"Does that include us having kids?" Johnny wondered.

"As long as you still want to," Lulu smiled.

"I want to," Johnny replied. "I want to raise a family with you. But, in order for that to happen, I need to know you're safe."

"Johnny, if this is about guards-" Lulu tried.

"I'm not taking no for an answer this time," Johnny cut in.

"Well, that's fine because I wasn't going to say no," Lulu smirked. "I was actually thinking about that while you were gone and if I have a guard and then maybe our kids have someone watching out for them when they come along, we'll be okay anyway."

"A guard, as in only one guard?" Johnny asked.

"Yes, one guard is enough," Lulu laughed.

"We'll see," Johnny said, tilting his head to the side and placing his free hand on the side of her face. "And Jason actually offered us some protection for after I leave the business. Just basic security precautions."

"We're lucky to have Jason," Lulu noted, releasing Johnny's hand so she could arrange herself in his lap.

"We're lucky to have each other," Johnny added. "I'd be lost without you."

"And I would be lost without you," Lulu muttered, placing a soft kiss to Johnny's lips.

"Literally," Johnny chuckled. "You'd probably still be wandering the woods outside of Port Charles."

"No, I'm sure I would have found another tent," Lulu countered. "Probably with another hot guy inside."

"You think I'm hot?" Johnny asked, smirking at her.

"I think I said that earlier," Lulu laughed.

"Earlier you told me I make you hot," Johnny smiled and began kissing her neck softly.

"Well, it's both," Lulu sighed, tilting her head to give Johnny better access to her skin. "You are hot, you make me hot, we have hot sex. All of the above."

Johnny laughed against her neck and pulled away to look in her eyes. She smiled at him and he automatically returned it.

"Everything is okay with us, right?" Johnny asked.

"Yeah," Lulu nodded. "I think it's better than okay. Today was hell, but we needed to have this conversation."

"I agree," Johnny smiled.

"But now that everything serious is behind us for the night, I think we should return to the hot sex topic," Lulu said with a wicked glint in her eyes.

"Do I have to drink chamomile tea first or can we skip that part?" Johnny wondered.

"Skip it," Lulu muttered, crashing her lips against his.

"Definitely skip it," Johnny agreed, standing up with her in his arms and heading for their bedroom.

"You're amazing," Johnny muttered, kissing Lulu's forehead gently.

"You're not too bad yourself," Lulu grinned, leaning her head on his bare chest.

"That's a contradiction," Johnny laughed, wrapping his arm securely around her. "Just a few minutes ago you were screaming that I was the best."

Lulu blushed and hid her face from him and he smiled. He brought his hands to her face and made her look up at him.

"I love you," Johnny said softly.

"I love you," Lulu replied, leaning in to kiss him.

"I know, but I still don't understand why," Johnny said, hugging her even closer to him. "You love me no matter what. Even though my father tried to kill you, even though taking my last name is like painting a target on your back."

"I love you because of who you are," Lulu explained. "Which I've told you before, but I'll tell you as many times as you need to hear it."

"So, you don't want me to change my name?" Johnny asked. "Become Joe Carpenter, some normal every day guy?"

"No because I love you just like you are," Lulu answered.

"Just like I am," Johnny sighed. "Thank you for loving me that way."

"So, can you make me a promise?" Lulu wondered.

"Of course," Johnny said quickly.

"If we ever get into a crazy situation where we have to change our names, can you think of something better than Joe Carpenter?" Lulu asked, smiling widely.

"What? You don't want to be Mrs. Joe Carpenter?" Johnny questioned, chuckling softly.

"I just think it's a little too plain for someone as amazing as you," Lulu replied, resting her chin on his chest.

"Well, if something crazy like that ever happens, I'll consult you for our name change," Johnny replied. "I only want to have a last name that you want to have."

"You know, even if your last name was Carpenter, I would want it," Lulu admitted. "Because I want people to know I'm yours."

"I can't wait until we get married," Johnny breathed. "You know, I asked Jason to be my best man."

"You did? That's perfect," Lulu responded.

"I thought so," Johnny agreed. "Do you have anyone in mind to be your maid of honor?"

"Well, before everything got crazy between us today, Carly and I made up," Lulu informed him. "And she's really my only girl friend, so I'll probably ask her."

"I'm glad you two worked things out," Johnny offered. "I hated being the reason you were on the outs with her."

"Well, it's okay now," Lulu smiled. "It's better than okay."

"It's going to stay that way," Johnny promised.

Lulu smiled and snuggled into his side and he closed his eyes. After one of the toughest days of his life, Johnny was falling asleep the way he loved most. With Lulu by his side. And he knew he was right. As long as he had Lulu, everything was better than okay. It was perfect and it was going to stay that way.


End file.
